Friday with Freda ~ Role of Responsibility

My grandma is getting old.

I know, you’re shocked. Because for six months now I have been talking on Fridays about the funny things she says and does and how she is in such amazing shape for someone who is eighty nine.

She inspires me.

But the last month it has started to seem like she is getting old.

Her mind is more forgetful. She has started to get more confused. She has had some physical things happen (nothing major) but enough that I am now starting to really see her decline.

I hate it.

It breaks my heart.

She is still funny and quick with a come back. She never hardly complains. But she is also starting to see things that simply aren’t there. She forgets what she is saying more than normal and I sense she knows she is not herself.

I wish I could say I have it all figured out about what to do. She made me her power of attorney last year, so I realize the responsibility that I have to  start making plans in her best interest. I need to start preparing for her last stage of life, because it is my role of responsibility as her caregiver to see this through. I need to be there for her, and to not selfishly get in the way of what I want, instead consider what is best for her and her needs.

But I’m also her granddaughter and some days the emotion of this role makes putting on the power of attorney hat a hard.

I am grateful for the support system I have. Jeff is such an amazing husband and the kids love Freda so much. My friends have been there to bounce concerns off of and to sometimes to talk me down off the ledge. Even though extended family may be across the miles, I know they are praying and understand the difficulties of having to sort through the mountains of options before me right now.

As I reflect on the last year and a half with Freda, no matter what happens, I’m so grateful for the time my family has had with her. We have made memories that my kids will NEVER forget. As I head into this winter season with her, I know that on hard days, the memories we have made will be the confidence I have knowing we did the right thing by moving her in with us.

This will get me through.

And that is a blessing.





  1. Laura Knox says:

    I love you, your family, and Freda! Thank you for sharing her with us too–your authenticity & honesty is sooo encouraging…

  2. Beautifully said, Julie. You put the care in care and the giver in giver! Love and hugs.

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